Posted in A Moment in My Life

“To Bait or Not to Bait”

A Moment in My Life – Tuesday, August 17, 2021

Jeannie Yee Davis

We were all strangers at one time or another. Once you’ve become friends, it’s hard to remember that, and that’s a good thing. The early stages of a relationship, when we first met and during the honeymoon stage, are difficult periods when you’re not sure what you’re getting yourself into yet. It’s true, not all people we meet are good for us. Some might even be harmful or dangerous.

When I first met Dennis Yee via FB, I didn’t know what to make of him. I was so gun shy of friending another guy at that time because I had just ended a new relationship that had somehow interjected itself into my world and turned my life upside down. I fell into a negative funk before realizing that this relationship was not good for me, and I had to end it. If it weren’t for my older sister, who knew Dennis since elementary school, telling me what a wonderful person he is, I wouldn’t have friended him. After three recent challenging, unwelcomed male encounters, I admit I wasn’t very nice to Dennis initially and gave him a lot of resistance, but being the sweetheart he was, he didn’t give up on me. He even went to big sis to make sure that he wasn’t making me uncomfortable. What a guy!

I am curious by nature—maybe that’s why I’m a writer. I kept wondering why I had never heard of Dennis when he and my sister were friends since childhood. I knew I couldn’t ask my sister because, unlike me, who is an open book, big sis is private as heck. I chanced, asking Dennis for their backstory, and that was the beginning of a beautiful friendship between Dennis and me. We adopted each other, and now I have a big bro. Big sis was right about Dennis being a wonderful person, and the more I knew him, the more I wondered why he and my sister never dated. In my humble opinion, and I mean no disrespect to my brother-in-law Ken or Dennis’ wife Happy, but I kept picturing Dennis and my sister in their younger days as the perfect couple. Dennis would’ve been a great brother-in-law.

During one of our conversations where he humored me with my in-law fantasy story that will only live on the page of my novel one day, he turned the tables on me and began asking me questions. He caught me off guard by asking me how I meet people. I thought that was a strange Segway to who knows where he was taking me. It turned out that he was taking his big bro role seriously and was concerned that I was meeting the wrong kinds of guys and suggested that I change my bait. Whoa! Where did that come from? For starters, I wasn’t trying to meet guys. Those unwelcomed encounters just happened, and I shut them down best I could immediately. 

And bait? What bait? What did he mean by bait? In the movies, girls played games to catch a guy, like playing dumb or pretending to be helpless, or faked liking things that the guy liked. Is that what he meant? I had to ask. Maybe from a guy’s standpoint, there was something juicy. I smacked my lips together and rubbed my hands as I waited for his response. I can’t wait. I can’t wait. Then he answered. He said, “This may not be set in stone. But involve yourself into areas of your liking, and that can lead to more common ground areas vs. not.” I asked him if that was it—his bait, and he confirmed it was. I told him that was so boring but spoken just like a wise person, but I was disappointed, sort of.

I expected a juicy story. In a way, I’m glad that was his final answer because it confirmed that he is a decent person. More reason why he is brother-in-law material. Well, at least I get him for my big bro and pretend brother-in-law. Good to know that he looks out for me. Now, he got me started. I am so curious about this bait thing. I don’t use bait. Do you? I am curious what y’all think. Has anybody used bait to get a date? If so, do share the details. And let me if you think yay or nay to bait or not to bait?  

One thought on ““To Bait or Not to Bait”

  1. Jeannie You don’t need any kind of bait. Love comes by natural means, in my opinion. You have to be the real you, and same with him, not make a relationship on falsehoods. We all have somethings we like, and shouldn’t pretend we like everything about the other person. I think you should be careful online, because people can make up stories. They might read what you post or like. I think who ever you want a long relationship, that something’s are vital. Exp. Them being a Christian. That to me is number 1. You love to travel so that’s something. You’re a butterfly, so the person needs to know you like to get together with friends and might need space. Like, Mark had piano lessons and you had bookclub. Just my opinion. Hope it helps you.

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